My MYT training experience - Christine Granja

I am currently taking the 100 hour Mindful Yoga Teacher training and am so extremely grateful for the scholarship I am receiving to be able to do so. I had been doing yoga for about 10 years, off and on, but it has really only been in the past year or so that my personal practice has taken on deeper and more spiritual meaning and intensity.I served in the U.S. Coast Guard for five years, in the early 1990’s, at a time when there were a lot of migrants trying to reach our shores for economic and political asylum. It was through my time served on a large cutter home-ported in Virginia that I had the opportunity to travel to Haiti, among other Caribbean nations. It was there that I saw such poverty and extreme living conditions, that I vowed to return one day and make a small difference in the lives of the people of that beautiful country. In 2011, I made that vow a reality and traveled for the first of many times to Haiti with a group from my church in Southbury, CT. I have been going down to Haiti every year since the earthquake and will continue to do so, leading groups as the immersion trip leader. In 2017 our small ministry grew into a non-profit corporation called Seeds of Hope for Haiti, Inc., with me serving on the board of directors. If it was not for the experiences I had in the Coast Guard to drive my passion and vision, I don’t think that this would have ever become a reality. In 2014 I had the honor to present my son Matt with his graduation certificate when he graduated from U.S. Coast Guard Boot Camp, in my uniform! I have always had and will always have such a sweet spot in my heart for service members and veterans. That is why I am excited to bring my 200 hour yoga teacher training that I have had through VETOGA, (founder Justin Blazejewski is also a MYT grad) and this 100 hour training with MYT, to veterans, active duty and their family members in Connecticut. I am currently starting work on bringing programs to various military installations in the state, along with the help and expertise of another MYT trained instructor. I hope to see this take off and become a regular offering to the service members stationed there and their families. Before I even started my yoga teacher training, I studied about trauma and how it affects the brain and how the “issues live in the tissues”. I attended the Yoga of Twelve Steps of Recovery leadership training in January in Surf City, NC. I started leading Y12SR meetings in my area in February of 2018, even before becoming a certified yoga instructor! (I had a partner who was certified who led the practice and I led the meeting.) I did not know if I would eventually become certified at first, but a few months after I had led a few sessions of Y12SR, I started looking into affordable ways that I could get my 200 hour certification. (I work full time at a local non- profit agency and do not have the financial means to be able to spend $2,000 to $3,000 on teacher training.) Through a Google search, I found VETOGA, Inc., a nonprofit run by a veteran who offers 200 hour teacher training's to other veterans, so that they could teach yoga in their communities to other military and vets. In order to gain a spot in this training, participants have to raise a certain level of funds. I set out to raise money for this organization in order to be included in the Spring 2018 class. With some hard work, and putting forth some money of my own, I was successful and headed to Alexandria, VA for training in May. It was in this training that we spent one afternoon talking about next steps, how we might partner with other similar organizations that bring yoga to veterans, or to take advantage of more training's that are in line with VETOGA's mission. Mindful Yoga Therapy was mentioned several times as the # 1 way to continue with more training in working with trauma. I was instantly curious because this was what I wanted to do from the very beginning, bring trauma -informed yoga to others. It was only natural that I seek it out after hearing from a friend that I should attend the 100 hour training, and it was starting very soon, in July of this summer. He set me up with Suzanne who offered me a scholarship and after filling out the application, I was in! Talk about timing and dharma, I felt this was the next right thing for me. I am particularly interested in what I have been learning from Suzanne at the Mindful Yoga Center. Her knowledge of working with veterans with PTSD is something that I feel can really benefit from personally, as I deal with anxiety and stress in my own life, it is a great tool in my toolbox that I can take to others. I can see myself working with others affected by traumatic stress, such as those who survived the terrible earthquake in Haiti in 2010, or just the stress and adverse experiences that are present where poverty exists. I feel strongly that yoga would benefit so many, and perhaps one day I will bring yoga and meditation to people in Haiti. This past summer on a recent trip, our group took a yoga class on a mountaintop there, and it was such a surreal experience. The clouds surrounded us, it was literally yoga in the clouds. I would love to offer more classes like that one day. Ever thankful for the opportunity to train with Suzanne and Mindful Yoga Therapy, I hope to pay it forward by carrying the tools of yoga, meditation and yoga nidra to the people in my community and abroad. Namaste, Christine

Acceptance

Acceptance

There is no denying the transformational power of yoga practice. People often start yoga looking to change their lives or change something about themselves. They come to yoga looking to lose weight, get stronger, improve balance, or feel better about their bodies. Some begin yoga looking to reduce stress, get more relaxed, or quiet their minds. But what about looking for acceptance?

It isn’t often that someone starts out with yoga looking to stay exactly the same as they are.

But as much as yoga is about change and transformation, yoga is also about cultivating acceptance, or santosha.

Santosha is a combination word in Sanskrit, derived from Saṃ and Tosha. Sam means “completely”, “altogether” or “entirely”, and Tosha, “contentment”, “satisfaction”, “acceptance”, “being comfortable”. Combined, the word Santosha means “completely content with, or satisfied with, accepting and comfortable”.
Accepting reality and seeing things as they really are does not mean stopping or giving up. Rather, it means accepting how we actually are and how we feel each day in a gentle and loving manner and moving forward from there. Sounds great, but how can we begin to cultivate this?
A  great place to begin is to cultivate acceptance each time you step onto the mat. For example, one day you might come to your mat feeling great. Your practice feels amazing, you are able to keep your attention on the breath and flow seamlessly through your practice. Another day you might have a completely different experience. You may be working with an injury or other physical limitation that prevents you from doing the classic expression of a posture. You might be grouchy or tired or sore. Maybe you have a lot going on in your mind or something stressful is happening in your life. When we practice acceptance, we acknowledge the body that we stepped onto the mat with today and how we are feeling. And then we proceed with the practice.
Sometimes, students start yoga and are frustrated that their bodies aren’t able to do things they think they should. Many of these individuals have been athletes or very physically active in the past and are frustrated that their bodies won’t do just as they could 5 or 10 or 40 years ago
Our bodies are not the same as they were 20 years ago any more than they are the same that they were yesterday or last week. The body, the breath, and the mind change all the time. These changes are normal and expected!
Practicing santosha does not mean giving up on the practice or the possibility of transformation. And it doesn’t mean getting nothing out of the physical postures. It means accepting that the practice is different each time.  Whether you have some limitations, or are in a bad mood,  you keep practicing. Accepting that each time finding that place between “nothing” and “hurting” is going to be a little different.

If you are continuously running negative stories through your mind, it might not seem possible to bring acceptance and contentment into all aspects of you life.

But practicing acceptance each time you are on your mat, can help develop the skills you need to bring this quality of contentment into the rest of your life. With time and practice, you will begin to distinguish between the stories you tell and the reality in front of you. Once you can do this,  you can begin to create distance between your story and who you truly are.And, as you begin to discern the difference between your story and what is actually going on in front of you, you will make the space to live in the moment, to accept what comes, and to create a brand new story about yourself—one that reflects your highest self, rather than a habitual or outdated yarn. That is when santosha becomes possible.

Mindful Yoga Therapy has been to Yoga in Me several times. Check out where we are headed to next.

Yoga Nidra - You Ain’t Awake, But You Ain’t Asleep Either

All this week, we’re going to highlight the benefits of Yoga Nidra as a form of yogic sleep. Yoga Nidra is one of Mindful Yoga Therapy’s five tools in our toolbox. The other four include: Pranayama, Asana, Meditation, and Gratitude. What makes Yoga Nidra so special is that it can be a more effective and efficient form of rest and rejuvenation than conventional sleep. The total relaxation achieved in a Yoga Nidra session is equivalent to hours of ordinary sleep. We reached out to our MYT graduates to see what their thoughts are about this ancient practice. Here are Ben King's thoughts on Yoga Nidra.

 


My first experience with yoga nidra was at the Washington DC VA.

I hadn’t slept through the night in weeks and when I was invited to try the class out at the I figured I had nothing to lose. The first thing that made me feel comfortable was being called New Guy by and old gnarly looking Vietnam Veteran. I like him immediately. When I asked him what this stuff was like he said, “well you ain’t awake, but you ain’t asleep either."

The teacher began the guidance by getting us focused on our breath. We did five minutes of alternate nostril breathing. Then she invited us to think about a place that we really like. A place that felt safe and secure. An internal recourse the teacher called it. I immediately thought about the lake house by grandparents built back in the 50s. Right on the lake in south western Virginia, I immediately let my thoughts go back there. The smell the sounds of the crows in the morning and the boats on the water. Then the teacher guided us to pay attention to different parts of our body. Starting at our feet she would say, now focus your attention on you left big toe, now the second toe and on and on she would literally just call out body parts for us to focus on and before I knew it everything slowed way down.

Like the Vietnam vet said I wasn’t asleep but I wasn’t awake either. It was like I was riding in a boat and my thoughts where the calm water beneath me. My thoughts seemed serene and calm and my awareness of them was easy and fluid. I had choice in what came to mind but my thoughts where so light that it was just easier to just let them float up and away.

The 45-minute class was over well before I thought it would be. After a few minutes of not wanting to leave my chair I thanked the teacher, said see you next week to the other vets, and walked back to my car. As I walked feeling better and more rested than I had felt in a long time I couldn’t help but think how much different my life would have been had I had this tool when I returned home from Iraq. Man I thought, years of self-medicating with booze and sleeping pills to fall asleep, what a waste. I didn’t lament my past for long. I had found a new tool and I planned on using it to the fullest. I went back to that class for 8-months straight and ended up getting certified in the iRest yoga nidra style. The practice changed my understanding of what tools were out there to deal with transition stress and PTSD. So my advice to any vet trying to manage transition is don’t create a tool box without yoga nidra in it. It ain’t sleep, but you ain’t awake either.


We would love to hear about how you use yoga nidra, meditation, yoga etc…to help you sleep. You can either use the hashtag #MYTYogaNidra, tag us in your post and/or send us an email (c.eder@mindfulyogatherapy.org) and we’ll add it to our blog.

Beyond Asana, The Ethical Practices of Yoga #MYTActsofKindness

The Yamas and the Niyamas

 

The Yamas and the Niyamas are ethical practices laid out for us in Patanjali’s 8-limb path presented in the yoga sutras. I like to think of them as a road map, guiding us in the right direction.

The five yamas, self-regulating behaviors involving our interactions with other people and the world at large, include:

  • Ahimsa: nonviolence
  • Satya: truthfulness
  • Asteya: non-stealing
  • Brahmacharya: non-excess
  • Aparigraha: non-possessiveness, non-greed.

The five niyamas, personal practices that relate to our inner world, include:

  • Saucha: purity
  • Santosha: contentment
  • Tapas: self-discipline, training your senses
  • Svadhyaya: self-study, inner exploration
  • Ishvara Pranidhana: surrender to a higher power

The Yamas and Niyamas are often seen as ‘moral codes’, or ways of living life to your full potential. To be ‘moral’ can be difficult at times, which is why this is considered a very important practice of yoga.

 

If we are to really benefit from a yoga practice, it has to expand beyond the mat and into life, so that we can move closer toward unity and wholeness. We are not only strengthening our bodies, but our minds and our hearts. The practice of yoga is realization that we are all one.

This month on February 17th we celebrate random acts of kindness. Frankly, our world needs more kindness. See how many times this month you can surprise someone with an act of kindness.

Lets make this a movement, maybe it will catch on………

Show the world that love matters.

#MYTActsofKindness #MYTChooseLove

 

xo - Suzanne

 

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Small Steps...Big changes!

Santosha | Acceptance, but not without action

Your yoga practice will help you learn to practice Santosha or Acceptance of what is, and where we actually are—in our mind and body—at each new moment and each new day and an important principle in our yoga practice.

But it isn’t always easy! This doesn’t mean we surrender or that we don’t take action.

In my last message, I mentioned that I am not a big believer in New Year’s Resolutions because they always make us feel as if we failed when we veer away, and we do veer away! However, if we make a conscious effort to make small changes and continue to find our way back to them, we find a way to treat ourselves with kindness. If we can treat ourselves with kindness, we can learn to treat others the same way.

Small steps….Big changes!

You may step on your yoga mat today and have an amazing practice that feels so good that you can’t wait to do it again tomorrow. When tomorrow arrives, you may have an entirely different experience. You may have physical limitations that don’t allow you to do the full expression of the posture. You may be tired, or just not feeling good. In practicing acceptance of how we actually are and feel each day, we just proceed on with our practice. We notice and then continue on. Santosha does not mean stopping or giving up! It means that you accept your practice is different each day and you continue on. You keep practicing. You accept you have some limitations, but you don’t let them stop you.

While this acceptance starts on your yoga mat, it will enter other areas of your life. There is freedom in discerning what you can change, what you can’t, and moving forward with that knowledge.

xo,

Suzanne


New Year…Best You…but how?

January 1st…the beginning of the year. A renewal. A day to start anew! A time to once again…be the best you…again! Of course, I could suggest that the best you is already in you…or that in order for you to be the best you…all you need to do is give yourself permission to do so. Regardless…many of us will use the beginning of the year as a launching point for the rest of the year. Some of us will call them resolutions, others goals…and even some of us will call them intentions. For me…I resolve to allow my intentions help me achieve my goals.

As practicing yogis…we all sort of share some common ideals. Compassion and kindness to one-self and others are certainly some of those shared ideals. So too is Santosha…or acceptance. So how can we better ourselves in a manner that is both compassionate and kind…all while accepting (santosha) that I am already all that I need?

I heard a perfect analogy for those of us looking to #MYTKickStart the new year. I was listening to the Tim Ferriss interview with LearnVest CEO Alexa Von Tobel. She suggested there were two types of people. Achievers and Competitors. I think this is the solution! We can better ourselves…we can allow ourselves be the best versions of ourselves…and we can do it with compassion and kindness. According to Von Tobel, it all boils down to whether you’re an achiever or competitor. Let me explain.

Von Tobel suggests that when an achiever (read yogi) wakes up, they make a list of goals, tasks, resolutions, intentions that they plan to achieve/accomplish. They then set out to do just that. Pretty simple…make a list…complete it…feel good! Conversely, a competitor will see the achiever making all of these great strides and think to themselves, “how can beat them…and be better than them?” The difference is stark! The achiever wants to be the best possible version of themselves…whereas the competitor simply wants to be better than you.

So…if you are going to, or desire to #MYTKickStart your year, be compassionate and kind to yourself. Allow yourself to achieve your goals and don’t allow yourself to compete…especially against yourself. #santosha

_()_ Namaste,

Chris

I'm so lonely...is that OK?

In November of 1978, English rock band, The Police released their debut album, …which we could argue could have been titled, The Police-Greatest Hits Volume 1. One of the songs on this album is titled “So Lonely!” It is perhaps the happiest song about being completely alone. The Police were HUGE…MEGASTARS…ON TOP OF THE WORLD. Yet, Sting the lead singer of The Police (in case you live under a rock), felt empty, “being surrounded by all this attention and yet experiencing the worst lonely feeling.” You wouldn’t have guessed it by the upbeat rhythm of the song, but by all accounts…Sting was suffering from depression. This song really peaked my interest. Why did it seem Sting was on top of the world…even though he seemingly and albeit joyfully reaching out for help? Two questions came to mind: 1) Does your individual perception of depression control the effects of depression and 2) Is it OK to be depressed?

According to a recent study, depression can be subdivided into four neurophysiological subtypes (‘biotypes’) defined by distinct patterns of dysfunctional connectivity in limbic and frontostriatal networks. This study suggests that depression is another spectrum issue that presents itself differently in every case. Jeff Masters is a yoga therapist, teacher, and author. Masters has been researching consciousness and the human energy field for over 30 years. He describes depression is a multi-phasic progression which needs to be addressed individually. It can be viewed through the lens of the Gunas as being of the nature of stagnation (Tamas) or exhaustion (Rajas). Perhaps in Sting’s case…he was exhausted by all of the attention, but felt like he had to keep doing whatever needed to be done in order to promote the album and the band. Masters adds that regardless to the source, depression requires mindful engagement…not avoidance.

Question 1: Does your individual perception of depression control the effects of depression?

Jeff Masters has been a somatic therapist and clinician for more than 30-years. He suggests, past experiences which inform your perception of reality, and impact your reaction to similar triggers, begin to unwind and arise into your consciousness. As this occurs your discerning mind (still unconscious) is activated and, if you haven’t yet done the work within the Yamas and Niyamas, will trigger your limbic system - the seat of your emotions. Which means your past impressions are experienced as occurring in the moment as opposed to being relegated to the past.

Depression triggers the hippocampus and the amygdala to activate the sympathetic nervous system. Masters says when this happens, “We have an on-load of stress hormones into the system. This can be of an acute level - causing anxiety, panic, fear, or anger. Or it can be sub-acute causing "feelings" of unease or insecurity.”

This is a cool point! In 1978, Sting, whose real name is Gordon Matthew Thomas Sumner, was just an English rockstar struggling with success. However, in 1990 he began his yogic journey and has ever since had a very strong yoga and meditation practice. Interestingly…there also have not been any songs like “So Lonely.” Perhaps, yoga and meditation work? Perhaps Sting…who could easily still suffer from depression from time to time…has done the work…and now his perception has changed, thus the way he presents it to the world has changed?

Question 2: Is it OK to be depressed?

I have been practicing yoga since 1999. Not a very long time in the grand scheme of life…but to be sure…a long enough time to have experienced the joys of relief it brings on so many different levels. I can remember when I first learned about yoga and struggled with my preconceptions. Did I have to wear a black speedo, grow my hair out and never wear a shirt again? (My first experience with yoga was a VHS tape of Rodney Yee. HA! ) Would I have to give up meat? Would I have to speak only of rainbows, unicorns, chakras, and peace? Would I have to completely change who I am? I could go into great length answering these…but I will be short in my answer: I believe yoga makes you the best version of you…regardless of any of the above mentioned thoughts/requirements. You still get to be you…just a much better version of you.

These thoughts however are valid! If yoga and meditation help with depression…then am I…or YOU…allowed to be depressed? According to Masters, there is a deep well of practitioners in Yoga / Self development field who feel like experiencing "negative" emotions is to be avoided. However, the Practice of Yoga (POY) innately accesses the recesses of our consciousness, our body, our energetic matrix which underlies it all. As this occurs and we continue the practice, we will increase the transformative heat within these specific aspects of being. In other words, as we do the work, there is a good chance past trauma can surface and present itself as anger…and over the long-term if not properly addressed…depression.

So…if I am understanding this correctly…YES…it is OK to feel angry and perhaps even depressed! The important aspect is what we do when these feelings arise. Masters says, “Your state of consciousness at the moment that you re-experience these impressions is crucial to denature or down regulate these mental and emotional triggers.” He suggests before these feelings become uncontrollable to set a Boundary of First Resistance, “take a breath and back off slightly. Begin surrounding the practice with the breath and stay as centered as we can in the calm awareness of the Buddhi mind (where the Mind and the Prana are one).”

The practice of Yoga WILL bring things up. Masters says to avoid the artifacts and their echoes that arise, is to “re-embed the traumas.” The goal of yoga/meditation is to assess the breath (prana and the mind), adjust the practice and to take refuge in the sadhana. Additionally, Masters highlights the importance of Self-Awarness and Ahimsa…aka no shame, “if you feel that the experience is too overwhelming to manage, then seek out assistance in the form of Sangha or even professional assistance. When in doubt seek it out (help).”

_()_ Namaste,

Chris

Ch Ch Ch Changes...

David Bowie - Changes 115908378I still don't know what I was waiting for And my time was running wild A million dead-end streets Every time I thought I'd got it made It seemed the taste was not so sweet So I turned myself to face me But I've never caught a glimpse Of how the others must see the faker I'm much too fast to take that test

Ch-ch-ch-ch-Changes (Turn and face the strange) Turn and face the strain Ch-ch-Changes

At the most basic level...Post Traumatic Stress (PTS) is a natural response to an unnatural event. Of course from this point...there are many jumping off points we can explore which would further define what PTS is. It is safe to say that after a traumatic event, your body and mind...change. The opening lyrics of David Bowie's "Changes," seem so fitting when it comes to describing the changes warriors with PTS go through. For me...I could easily change the lyric: "...and my time was running wild," and replace it with "...and my mind was running wild!" Bowie continues with the lyric, "turn and face the strange." This could very well be the first step in post traumatic growth! In yoga terms we might call this santosha. Santosha has a direct translation to contentment, however, I like to translate it as acceptance. It is often very difficult for those struggling with PTS to feel...to feel comfortable being themselves...to face the stranger that is now them.  - Chris Eder | MYT Director of Communication

Mindful Yoga Therapy strives to provide the appropriate tools to help those who suffer from PTS. Additionally, our 15 and 100-hour training programs strive to provide a teaching protocol that will help cultivate not regulate a daily practice for these warriors. Perhaps...even leading to some amazing life changes.

These changes often extend to the yoga teacher as well.

We asked our Outreach Coordinator for Veterans, Anthony Scaletta how the 100-hour MYT training changed him! Here is his answer:

Desert Camo

The Mindful Yoga Therapy (MYT) training pretty much changed everything about my practice. I feel that it took my understanding of yoga much deeper than the physical and into the layers of the subtle, mental and emotional bodies through our in-depth exploration of the nervous system. MYT training asked me to both learn about and then directly experience how the various tools of yoga affect the nervous system. For example, MYT taught me how to use yogic tools such as the breath in relatively simple ways that can have profound results on the practitioner. For those with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD,) we are perpetually stuck in the fight/flight response with our ‘foot on the gas pedal’ and in MYT we learn how to ‘pump the breaks’ and balance out the nervous system by activating the parasympathetic or relaxation response via the yoga practices in the MYT toolkit. As someone with PTSD, I find using the tools of MYT in my yoga practice to be very supportive and grounding. I have found a lot of healing in a regular practice of Yoga Nidra, which MYT training helped me to explore. Perhaps, the most significant change to come from undertaking the MYT training was that it laid the foundation for my formal seated meditation practice. Prior to MYT training I had dabbled with many different forms of meditation but never settled into a formal daily practice. That all changed when MYT Founder and Director, Suzanne Manafort, challenged us to commit to sitting for 40 days straight during our 100 Hour Training Program. If we missed a day, we would simply start again and continue until we strung together 40 consecutive days with a seated meditation. I had a few slips before I completed the challenge but it was highly effective in teaching me the benefits of a daily mediation practice. I have not missed a single day since I completed the challenge and that was over a year ago. Hands down the greatest change in my life and my practice to come out of MYT training has come from the meditation practice that I learned. It has been a total game changer.

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Anthony will be teaching at the White Lotus Wellness Center in College Park Maryland March 10-12. You can register here for this training.

Did Yoga Find You...or Did Yoga Find You?

In the book, How Yoga Works, by Geshe Michael Roach, a young girl named Friday is arrested when she crosses the boarder with an ancient copy of the Yoga Sutras. While in jail, she notices the Captain is suffering from pain. Over time...and I mean...a long time...Friday teaches the Captain...how yoga works. In this story, yoga found the Captain just at the right time. Over the years, I often ask people, "How did you find yoga?" The answers generally fall into two categories: I found yoga, or yoga found me. I asked this question to our Outreach Coordinator for Veterans, Anthony Scaletta this question...here is his answer.

Pearl Harbor

Yoga found me. I believe that’s just how it works – when you are ready (i.e. life’s challenges and experiences have prepared and opened you to receive the teachings) the practice of yoga will find you. It’s a spin on the old maxim that when the student is ready; the teacher appears. Well, I feel that when a person is ready to begin practicing; the yoga appears. The scope and diversity of yoga make it intrinsically adaptable which lets the yoga practice meet someone right where they are in a way that is most useful and meaningful to them at the time. It is in this way I feel that yoga finds you. That’s how yoga found me. I was in a lot of pain mentally, physically, emotionally and spiritually and I was seeking to ease my suffering. It provided me (and continues to do so) with many tools to address the various layers of my being while carving out the path toward healing and wholeness. Yoga found me about a year after I separated from active-duty and gave me a way to reconnect to my body and find some support and grounding. In this way it really helped as I struggled to reintegrate into civilian life. I honestly don’t know where I would be if yoga hadn’t found me at such a critical time because I had been on such a destructive path with drugs and alcohol and some really risky behavior. That was over a decade ago and yoga still seems to be finding me in new ways as it continually supports me through all the ups and downs of life. The challenges I face are my teachers and the yoga provides me with the tools to skillfully navigate them. I believe that yoga is truly a gift and I mean it when I say that yoga saved me. That is why I am now so committed to sharing the practice of yoga with others, particularly my fellow brothers and sisters that have served, because I wholeheartedly believe in its transformative powers to heal, empower and inspire people to step into their fullest potential.

 

Anthony will be leading a 15-hour Mindful Yoga For Trauma Training For Yoga Teachers program at White Lotus Wellness Center, (College Park MD) March 10-12. Space is still available. Register Here!

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MYT Guiding Principle | Mindfulness (Part 2)

MadMimi Banner_Mindfulness-01

It's funny...the more I depend on technology to make me more efficient, the more it seems my life is full of things to do. I feel the very same technology I use to keep up in this fast-paced life...the more hectic my life becomes. Sometime to the point where I don't even get to...or more importantly...forget to enjoy it!

Mindfulness in its simplest form breaks down like this: paying attention, on purpose, in this moment, and without judgment. The mindfulness aspect of Mindful Yoga Therapy consists of two primary components:

Vietnam veteran John Reib practices Mindful Yoga Therapy1. Paying attention to the present moment 2. Maintaining an attitude of acceptance and non-judgment

Today, Suzanne Manafort, MYT Founder, follows-up with Part 2 of Mindfulness which deals with acceptance. Acceptance (Santosha)

Acceptance is an important part of mindfulness, and santosha is a key component of any therapeutic yoga practice. Santosha is the yogic principle of contentment and acceptance of what is actually arising in the body-mind. This acceptance does not at all infer non- action, but rather is the basis for transforming patterns in the body-mind. Santosha involves a degree of “allowing” that can be practiced only when inner support, grounding, and connecting to the earth have been firmly established.

The emphasis on acceptance is especially important for veterans with PTS due to the high incidence of guilt and moral injury that arises from the traumatic events they experience during military service. Many veterans have participated in activities that they later feel intense guilt and shame about. Conversely, other veterans feel a strong sense of guilt and shame about things they did not do or could not prevent. These negative feelings about past events, and the tendency to replay these events in the mind, prevent many veterans from living in the present moment. This negativity is often manifested as anger, restlessness, struggling, and isolation from others. By fostering santosha in our students, we can help them not only feel better about these past events, but also become more comfortable living in the present.

Peace & Love,

Suzanne

MYT Teacher Highlight - Susann Spilkin

elephant-love-774430_10151443717508420_680415199_oWhen Susann Spilkin first tried yoga during the early 70's, it wasn't to learn the ways of the enlightened, rather it was a way to escape for a night out with her husband. However, it wasn't long before the allure of listening to the Beatles playing in the yoga classes that yoga turned from 'something alternative to try,' to 'joy from being inside her body' in a way she had never been before. Similarly, that is the one of the goals of Mindful Yoga Therapy. The tools provided in the MYT practices are a powerful complement to professional treatment for Post Traumatic Stress. Tools that when used in tandem with professional talk therapy help veterans reconnect to their bodies. Susann's father was in the Air Force Reserves. She recalls a trip to the Detroit VA where she took her father for an appointment. While walking through the hallways she experienced great joy, much like her first yoga experience. She really enjoyed sharing a smile, or even eye contact with the Vets at the VA. Perhaps a felt experience, or perhaps an authentic experience. Susann's Veteran connection begins and ends with her dad, but that doesn't mean she isn't connected. "I may not have experienced anything our vets have experienced in their service, but we are more alike than we are different; we all want the same things….to feel good and to live a life with as much peace and joy as possible."

Susann is in fact spreading peace and joy. She teaches yoga using the MYT principles to veterans at the Detroit VA Medical Center as well as the Domiciliary Residential Rehabilitation Treatment Program. Additionally she has presented MYT at the Michigan Association of Treatment Court Professionals Annual Conference in the hopes of introducing MYT into the Michigan Veteran’s Treatment Courts. Rolf Gates often says in his class, "plant good seeds...and good fruit will grow. Well, the seeds have been planted and they are already beginning to grow. Susann has been contacted by the Ann Arbor, Michigan VA Transition Management Team to bring yoga to their post-911 vets; the Detroit VA Medical Center Military Sexual Trauma Department for a women’s only MYT program; and the Macomb County Vet Center wants a MYT program as well.  If you think that is a lot of work for one person to handle...you're right! Three of our recent 100-hr graduates are stepping into these opportunities.

A mindful, embodied yoga practice can provide relief from symptoms and develop the supportive skills that veterans need in their everyday lives. Yoga has proven to aid in a veteran’s healing journey. This healing power, or journey is not only for the veteran. It is a two-way path. Susann believes her personal practice has been fortified by her MYT training and teaching. She says the principals were always present but now have a deeper meaning.  "The actions and effects that I took for granted truly seem like precious gifts now. Gratitude plays a much bigger role in my own practice/teaching and life. I am more aware than ever of the power of the practice to support a balanced nervous system and can equate that to the yogic quality of sattva."

Getting a yoga student to take a teacher training class is pretty easy. Easier still is getting a yoga teacher to take a yoga class. However, it still seems somewhat elusive to get veterans to try yoga. Susann offers this advice. "Remember the old Life cereal advertisement?....'Try it, Mikey likes it!' Ask your buddies who have tried yoga; you are more likely to believe and trust them than me.  Those who have tried it are likely to tell you they are sleeping better, have a handle on their anger, that their relationships with their families have improved and they have a level of self-acceptance that they haven’t felt in a long time. You are likely to hear them tell you that they are less often numb or controlled by their emotions and that they are feeling more and in a good way."

Solid advice to be sure. However, what if you don’t have a buddy letting you know how yoga has given them tools to deal with life? Susann suggests grabbing one or two of them and finding out together.

If you're a veteran and are looking to try yoga, but are not sure where to start...contact our Outreach Coordinator for Veterans, Anthony Scaletta. If you're a yoga teacher who is interested in taking one of our programs, check out the program schedule for a class near you.

MYT Guiding Principle | Mindfulness (Part 1)

MadMimi Banner_Mindfulness-01Mindfulness is a major buzzword in today's fast-paced, I want it now world we live in. Slowing down for some seems so far fetched...and perhaps even unachievable. Mindfulness in its simplest form breaks down like this: paying attention, on purpose, in this moment, and without judgment. The mindfulness aspect of Mindful Yoga Therapy consists of two primary components:

Suzanne Manafort, founder and director, Mindful Yoga Therapy for Veterans

1. Paying attention to the present moment 2. Maintaining an attitude of acceptance and non-judgment

Today, I want to talk about how we can pay attention to the present moment in Part 1 of Mindfulness. Present Moment Awareness The cultivation of mindfulness can be very challenging, but it is an important piece of any yoga therapy practice for veterans with PTS. Often they live outside of the present moment, avoiding painful reminders of trauma or actively re-experiencing traumatic events. At other times, people who suffer from PTS are in the present moment, but are there with a great deal of fear and anxiety because they experience elements of their current situation as threatening and unsafe. Avoidance and hyper-vigilance are primary symptoms of PTS. The meaning a person gives to internal physical sensations has enormous implications for physical and psychological health. Often, individuals with PTS interpret internal sensations as abnormal or frightening. As a yoga therapist, you can help your students minimize symptoms by normalizing the sensations experienced, reframing their meaning, and reducing the tendency to catastrophize. In Mindful Yoga Therapy, we are invited to intentionally focus on the sensations in their yoga practice, both to find comfort and to learn to be present and non-reactive to sensations of discomfort. The comfortable sensations then become a source of support, and the uncomfortable sensations become dissociated from fear and anxiety.

Peace & Love,

Suzanne

Support Precedes Action in Colorado

902707_636102863139375_7326619904782601498_oAmanda Neufeld and Colten Peed own and operate Yoga Studio Satya in Colorado Springs, Colorado. They have a very clear and focused mission statement:

To Bring Joy and Health to the Body and Mind, to Inspire and Love Without Judgment and Create a Community Beyond the Walls in Which we Practice.

And this is exactly what the two of these yogis from "The Springs" are doing. They have already hosted a 15-hour Mindful Yoga Therapy weekend course, as well as a 100-hour teacher training program. Colten and Amanda have also signed up to host another 15-hour course next year.

Colorado Springs is a perfect location to reach out to and serve Veterans. Colorado Springs is home to five military bases so a a good portion of the population is currently serving or has served. When they opened their studio they initially wanted to be a local non-profit that supported yoga in the community...that is how they found The Give Back Yoga Foundation (GBYF). GBYF has several programs for under-served communities...one of which is Mindful Yoga Therapy, which seemed appropriate for their demographic. So, they reached out to Suzanne Manafort to host a 15-hour training. According to Amanda, once they met Suzanne Manafort, "we knew were a part of something really incredible." Of the tools in the the MYT Toolbox, Amanda and Colten (like Suzanne) believe Support Precedes Action is the most important, "we must learn how and be willing to support ourselves. Support Precedes Action...whether this be in body, environment or relationship, there is a willingness to be receptive and aware." According to Colten and Amanda, this MYT principal allows you to return to a natural flow without trying to fix or change yourself.

For Amanda and Colten, what makes the Mindful Yoga Therapy training standout is the educational focus on the nervous system, guided nidra and calming breath practices that are sometimes overlooked in other training programs that are more asana based. Additionally, they believe the training is very helpful in discussing the military culture and language that is appropriate, while understanding PTS and levels of severity and how it effects the health of the individual.

"I think this training was the path I was looking for to deepen my own studies of therapeutics and trauma and I feel much more prepared to meet my clients with the tools we've learned through this training." - Amanda

10435415_656913951058266_1709497349497562238_n

Getting a Veteran on the mat can sometimes be super easy...and sadly...sometimes hard. Colten and Amanda have a pretty straight-forward idea on how to approach Vets to practice yoga.

"Although yoga can be perceived as fancy foot work, too difficult or it seems too fluffy - I say find a place that seems like a good fit and give it a try! There are several classes around town offered to veterans for free, there are classes at the VA and there are a few studios in town that also work privately if that is a better fit. If you're physical body is in pain or you've had an amputation: yoga can help increase range of motion, build strength and balance and help decrease pain, if you have PTS, anxiety or depression: yoga can help you increase breath capacity which calms the nervous system, if you have a hard time sleeping: yoga nidra can help you find rest without pills. There are many positive benefits of yoga that will meet you where you are."

So far this year, with the help of MYT, GBYF & Gaiam, Yoga Studio Satya has been able to donate yoga mats and tool kits for TAPS & the 127th MP CO. Colten and Amanda believe the MYT program has been so thoughtfully developed and truly cares for each veterans as an individual. More importantly, they say they are grateful to have the opportunity to support such tremendous work these men and women do and offer a way to serve them and their families.

If you are interested in helping serve the Veteran population, or perhaps you own a yoga studio and want to host a MYT event, please send us an email.

Memorial Day Growth

Memorial Day Growth-01Memorial Day is a very interesting day. For some, it is the official beginning of summer, highlighted by family barbeques. For others, it is a day to mourn the loss of those who paid the ultimate sacrifice. Some even celebrate the brave men and women who are currently serving. I have had the honor to serve with some amazing heroes over the past two-plus decades. Included in this list are many who have never wore a uniform, but proudly support, honor and cherish those who have. One of those is a friend, and fellow Frog Lotus Yoga graduate, Lisa Bassi. She recently posted these words…and I found them to be very fitting:

Memorial Day and Veteran's Day come once a year. It is only right that we should give thanks for those who serve and protect us. I know it is traditional to dedicate Memorial Day to those who gave their lives but I think we should also consider those who gave the life they knew and now live a different life. They planned to serve and then to come back to what we all have but, for many, coming back is not so easy. The life they dreamed of is no where to be found. Instead they have a life they never conceived of - with PTSD, illness or injury. Help them hold on. Remember them now, when they need us most. Flags and wreaths and ceremonies are great - but a kind word, supporting a business, a phone call, letter or helping hand - these things make a difference too. So, this Memorial Day, honor the fallen and also those who gave their lives. Their sweet simple lives, for us. -Lisa Bassi

The reason you celebrate aside, I’d like to take a few moments to talk about an often over-looked military population worthy of our mourning and celebration…the Vietnam Veteran.

I am not suggesting there is a group of warriors more or less deserving, rather I want to publically mourn a group of warriors who came before me. I often tell those who will listen, that I don’t know where I would be today if I didn’t have a strong yoga and meditation practice before I went off to war. The Vietnam Vet in most cases didn’t have one…and the battles they faced and face on a daily basis are unspeakable. Additionally, there were no KickStarter campaigns to help cover medical and housing costs. None of them jumped onto Twitter to bash the local Veterans Affairs office on the lack of services available to them. Times were indeed tough. In the book, What It Is Like To Go To War, Karl Marlantes writes about the need for a “psychological and spiritual combat prophylactic.” Marlantes suggests the reason is because going to combat is much like unsafe sex, “it’s a major thrill with possible horrible consequences.” Imagine how that would have played out today with the proliferation of mobile technology, narrowcasting, 24-hour information/news cycles and citizen journalism at an all-time high. The memes alone would generate enough attention and dare I say money to fund the above mentioned housing and medical costs.

As a journalist, I have seen with my lens and the lens of my fellow combat journalist the physical, emotional and spiritual toll of war. What I have learned of trauma is that it sees no religion, gender, creed, nor orientation. It equally spreads its grips across all socio-economic boarders. The effects are real. They are painful. They are 100-percent indiscriminate. Often they paralyze their captor to the point of no return.

The National Vietnam Veterans' Readjustment Study (NVVRS) highlighted some alarming statistics about the Vietnam Veterans. Overall, the NVVRS found that at the time of the study approximately 830,000 male and female Vietnam theater Veterans (26%) had symptoms and related functional impairment associated with PTSD. Just so you know, Columbus Ohio is the 15th largest city in the United States with just about 836,000 people. Can you imagine what we would do as a nation if we decided to ignore the entire city of Columbus? If we decided it was no longer important to us to take care of them? The  NVVRS study found just shy of 31% of men and 27% of the female worries who fought for us in Vietnam suffer from lifetime PTSD. I can tell you first hand with all of the resources at my disposal, the past 13 years have been in a word…HELL. I can’tYoga-Readiness-Initiative-Military-Patch-300x300 imagine 41 years of it…with little to no support. Mindful Yoga Therapy is honored to have the Give Back Yoga Foundation (GBYF) as our parent…so to speak. GBYF is launching their Yoga Readiness Initiative this Memorial Day. This project aims to bring free Yoga Readiness Kits to active duty military and their families. These kits offer service men and women a way to explore the practice of yoga as a tool to heal from the traumas they experience through deployment.

 

_()_Namaste,

Chris Eder, Retired Air Force

Istanbul was Constantinople...and soon Newington Yoga will be...

Newington Yoga Center

THIS IS BIG NEWS!

 

The Mindful Yoga Therapy team is extremely honored to announce the Newington Yoga Center will soon be the Mindful Yoga Therapy Training Center...basically, our new Headquarters. MYT Founder, Suzanne Manafort has been operating the two separately, but over the past few years, there has been more and more requests for training. Suzanne says this transition, "is a natural evolution."

Not only has there been more requests for training, but our team is getting bigger too. Suzanne believes a dedicated home base will allow MYT to, "expand the way that we serve our local community with our center."

Mindful Yoga Therapy is for everyone and so too will be the training center. According to Manafort, "The center will be open to all. The focus at the MYT training center will be mindful programs and the ability to work with people that have experienced trauma, or are dealing with stress and anxiety."

Rob Schware is the co-Founder and Executive Director for the Give Back Yoga Foundation. MYT is one of the four programs GBYF supports. Schware believes having a dedicated training center will enhance their mission of bringing yoga and mindful-based programs to underserved and under-resourced segments of the community. "MYT is not just for veterans. Having a dedicated training center will help train yoga teachers and people living with or managing eating disorders, stress and anxiety disorders, drug and alcohol addiction, and domestic violence."

For the Newington local yogis, it will be business as usual. Same great classes and same great teachers. A new sign may be in the works.

Support Precedes Everything with Suzanne Manafort

The principle of support preceding action states that if we want to feel connected and integrated in our movement, we need to know where our support is coming from before we engage in any action. For example, in Mindful Yoga Therapy we learn to recognize the earth firmly beneath us in order to allow ourselves to receive its support. Knowing we have the support we need before we make any move forward, take our next step in life, or even simply move into a yoga posture is essential. In other words: Support Precedes Everything

Maintaining your own practices and keeping your body and nervous system healthy are of utmost importance. Your personal yoga practices are as important as what you are teaching. Your Pranayama, Asana, Yoga Nidra, Meditation, and Gratitude should not be neglected.

The grounding connection to earth lets us know that we have the support we need to move forward safely and with stability. This earthy, grounded feeling provides a calm presence, steadiness, and sense of ease.

With continued practice, our students may find new sensations of having support under them in many different areas of their bodies. They may begin to spontaneously initiate movement from those supports. When our students know where their support is coming from, they find more comfort. Finding this connection and relationship with earth may help our students begin to find a renewed relationship with themselves as well. Finding and nurturing this relationship with the self, and feeling fully supported by the earth, allows them to begin to explore their relationships with others.

One of the 6 supports

Connecting to Earth

Connecting to earth, or grounding, is one the earliest supports we begin to explore and this creates an active Grounding Feet1relationship between earth and us. Planting our feet or hands on the earth is the primary foundation for nurturing an understanding of what it is to be in relationship. By yielding into the earth, we are better able to receive its support and stay grounded in the present moment. This process teaches us to be in relationship with ourselves as well as with the earth on which we stand or rest.

We ask students to imagine being able to walk through life feeling fully connected to earth and to themselves. Developing a conscious relationship between self and earth fosters an ability to trust the support beneath you. This trust may lead to a sense of ease in relationships with others as well. MYT Mandala Logo_Clear-01There are many free resources available to help you find support. You can find them HERE!

Christine M SPA-01

 

Support Precedes Action and the Patterns of Life

  Support Precedes Action is one of the...say it with me..."most important tools" in the Mindful Yoga Therapy toolbox.  But what does it mean to you? Tanya Del Priore is a Navy Veteran and yoga teacher who completed the 100-hour MYT training at Studio Bamboo in Virginia Beach. Here is what Support Precedes Action means to her.

By Tanya Del Priore, 18 Jan 2016        

I first encountered the phrase and principle of “support precedes action,” during the Mindful Yoga Therapy 100-hr teacher training in Virginia Beach, VA.  The best explanation of the expression is an exploration of how the principle manifests itself in everyday life, on and off of the mat.  I have reflected over my 52-years of life and have come to understand two things.  First, I have been pract12573105_10205818522883527_4092485831782063747_nicing this principle of support precedes action even though I had no words to describe it.  Secondly, in life, things always happen in patterns.  When two patterns are put together, a third will appear.  Let me explain.

My first pattern in life occurred during my childhood where I experienced a traumatic event.  I received immediate support from my family members and was able to move forward in life.  The action was moving forward and not hanging onto the traumatic event.  Learning, at a young age, how to move forward will serve me well during my next pattern in life.  My second life pattern was serving for 23 years in the United States Navy.  I was supported by years of training that taught me how to “react” appropriately in a stressful and traumatic events and I have been exposed to many unnatural events.  I have fought fires onboard ship, collided with other ships, swarmed by low flying unidentified aircraft, I have seen many people seriously injured, and witnessed suicides.  I was able to manage my way through each of these events with the support of fellow Sailors; you could say we were all in the same boat (a Sailor’s term of endearment for ship).  It was the support of these Sailors and the sense of community that supported me through things that do not happen naturally in life.

After serving for 23 years, then came my time to leave the Navy and I retired in 2008; I was happy and sad at the same time.  I was happy to be with my family at home but sad to leave my Navy family community behind.  Then a third pattern emerged when I started practicing yoga in 2011.  I was supported by those in the class and by the teacher.  I was sharing the expressions of yoga poses even though our individual experiences were different.  I met so many people who shared yoga with others for different reasons.  Why did this place of yoga feel so familiar?  It was because if felt similar to the place I had recently left and had served with for 23 years, the Navy.  Today, I practice yoga because I am supported by others and I support them.  I practice yoga because every pose is a “safe action” and for 23 years in the Navy I experienced plenty of “crazy military action”.  Yoga provides a safe place for good, appropriate, and natural occurring action to happen.  Each day, I practice recognizing patterns, triggers, and then I support myself with the tools of yoga to help me “act” (not “react”) in a manner that is beneficial to my health and well-being.  Remember, support ALWAYS precedes action.

 

ThMYT Mandala Logo_Clear-01ere are many free resources available to help you find support. You can find them HERE!

 

Heather Elliot SPA Insta-01

Happy Veteran's Day

Happy Veteran's Day!

 

The brave men and women wh serve our country are sent out to fight wars without being given the choice of wether or not to do so.  You might not agree with the wars we fight but that is no reason to show anything but respect for these brave souls.  They sacrifice their time to their families and anfriends and many have sacrificed their lives.

 

This Veteran's Day, reach out and thank a Veteran.  Not only will he or she feel good because of your thoughtfulness but, by expressing your gratitude, you will immediately feel a sense of happiness.

 

From everyone at Mindful Yoga Therapy, we'd like to thank you, Veterans, for all that you have given of yourself so that we can continue to have and enjoy our freedoms here at home.

 

The Noble and the Brave: A Veteran's Day Tribute

by Joanna Fuchs

 

When America Had an urgent need

These brave ones raised a hand

No hesitation held them back

They were proud to take a stand

 

They left their friends and family

They gave up normal life

To serve their country and their God

They plowed into the strife

 

They bought for freedom and for peace

On stage and foreign shores

Some lost new friends; some lost their lives

In long and brutal wars

 

Other veterans answered a call

To support the ones who fought

Their country had requirements for

The essential skills they brought

 

We salute every one of them

The noble and the brave

The ones still with us here today

And those who rest in a grave

 

So here's to our country's heroes

They're a cut above the rest

Let's give the honor that is due

To our country's very best

 

 

Anthony Scaletta interviewed on Reload Radio

_JTA8795 (1) MYT's Anthony Scaletta was interviewed on Reload Radio.  Listen to the full interview here.

Anthony, Mindful Yoga Therapy's Outreach Coordinator for Veterans and a graduate of our 100 hour certification program, served as a US Navy Special Warfare Combatant Crewman (SWCC) with Naval Special Warfare Group 1 out of San Diego, California from 1998-2003. He was an 11 Meter RHIB operator and did two deployments to the Northern Arabian Gulf region conducting Maritime Interdiction Operations and reconnaissance missions.

As a result of his service he was diagnosed with PTSD, Anxiety, Depression and OCD.  He also suffered chronic pain and underwent spinal fusion surgery. It was through these “opportunities,” which he used to call obstacles, that yoga found Anthony--and it immediately resonated with him as the way to heal and reintegrate after his military service.

Meet Anthony and learn more about his Mindful Yoga Therapy mission.

#22aDayChallenge

Ali Warrick (Yoga With Ali Warrick) and Chris Eder (MalaForVets) are leading the charge for a 22-Day Challenge to raise awareness about the daily rate of Veteran suicides. The two hope to raise, not only awareness, but funds for two non-profits making a difference in the quality of life of Veterans: Save A Warrior and Mindful Yoga Therapy. For 22 days starting May 1st, Ali and Chris will post various pictures and videos of themselves performing a yoga move, yoga sequence, or fitness-related exercise on their Instagram pages (Chris: @afnbroadcaster, Ali: @yoga_w_ali ) These posts will also be shared on their Facebook pages. The goal is to encourage others to do the same. This share & post social media campaign is the thrust behind the awareness component of the campaign. To make things sweeter, Mindful Yoga Therapy has offered up some swag and MalaForVets has offered up a Strength & Courage mala. Guidelines are below on how to be entered to win

HOW YOU CAN HELP!

OPTION 1

For 22 days (starting May 1st), post a picture of yourself doing the daily pose tagging all hosts and sponsors and using #22aDayChallenge! Beginners welcome! All of our poses will be accessible to ensure every yogi can participate!

OPTION 2

Yoga isn’t your thing? Donate $22  and take a screen shot of your confirmation! Post and tag us using all of the hashtags to let us know you chose to support in a different way!

To be eligible for prizes:

  • Follow our hosts & sponsors on Instagram: @afnbroadcaster, @yoga_w_ali, @givebackyogafoundation, @mindfulyogatherapy, @saveawarrior, @fractal.9, @flexiblewarrior
  • LIKE our hosts and sponsors on Facebook: @MalaforVets, @Yoga With Ali Warrick, @givebackyogafoundation @saveawarrior, @mindfulyogatherapy, @flexiblewarrior, @heather’s treasures, @Fractal 9
  • Repost this Challenge Announcement to help spread the word, tagging all hosts and sponsors.
  • ADD these hashtags to all of your posts: #22aDayChallenge #SaveAWarrior #MindfulYogaTherapy #Gratitude #GiveBackYogaFoundation #Yoga_w_Ali #MalaforVets #afnbroadcaster

Your profile needs to be public so we can see your posts!

Thank you to all who choose to join in on this challenge and help spread awareness for our veterans and the organizations that support them.

Stand Down Marine - A Veteran's Testimony

1009954_1415912508723922_3344808858957432595_nStand Down Marine - A veteran's testimony

From Day 1, as a Marine it is ingrained in our very moral fiber never to surrender, quit, or leave a man behind. To keep the moral values of honor courage and commitment is something many Marines strive for even after leaving the Corps. For many of us in combat situations we endure things that are horrific, and painful. Though as a war fighter we shut the pain off in order to continue with the mission, often replace it with rage and heightened sensitivity. When you are deployed you live with your guys day in and day out ready to lay down your life for your buddy. There is no way to explain the bonds we create to someone who has never been. Though I can say my fellow Marines are as close, if not closer, to me than my own family.

We come home after being deployed, and we are sent to a few classes about PTS, told not to drink and drive, fight, or get into domestic disputes. We come home from being so close, and for many of us we come home to not much of any family, or social life. I often would listen to someone in conversation, and be asked “Andrew, did you hear anything I just said?” I was gone, off in my own mind.

With PTS, I began, like many of my Brothers and Sisters do, to medicate. I would drink, until I was medicated, then the drinking stopped replaced by meds, or a combination of both I did whatever it took to be numb. My thoughts raced, I had nightmares, and I wanted to die but didn’t have the nerve to kill myself. I was miserable in my own skin, and to make it worse I had lost 3 years of sobriety when I drank coming home from deployment. The last 4 years has been a struggle, sober, drinking, depressed, and repeat. It’s a vicious cycle that eventually made suicide seem like a legit alternative. I wanted to die, and was starting to feel the courage to do it. Thank God, for God - that feeling that we get when that guardian angel whispers “no.”

I’m broken, but I’m fixable, if I can be an example of getting sober, then I can be an example of starting over. Today I’m Andrew; I have a problem with PTS, and Whiskey, but most of all I have a problem with what’s going on in between my ears. Today, I’m sober.

It’s very difficult to admit defeat, but it is necessary to recover, so I surrender. I need help. “Please help” was the hardest, most rewarding thing I ever did. Please ask yourself honestly, “do I want to be a testimony or a statistic?” Suicide is not the answer; whiskey, pills, depression, and isolation is not the answer. For many of us we have a dual diagnosis, addiction, alcohol, post traumatic stress. I have backup, a quick reaction force, I like to call him God. I was told, when I began my journey to recovery, to find Him and ask for His help. The shame is not in surrender, it’s in pride and ego telling you that you can do it on your own. Until that pride and ego tells you that “your nothing, no one cares, screw it,” then you may find yourself like me, seriously considering, some days, just ending my life. That’s not the answer, if you don’t see it I hope you do after you read this. Giving into PTS, or Suicide is like a 3000 mile sniper shot taking you out from the Middle East. I, for one, do not want to give those bastards the satisfaction of knowing I wasn’t strong enough to endure being here at home.

There is no difference for this Marine to stick a gun against my head or take a shot of whiskey to feel numb. It will all lead me the same place, morally, spiritually, or physically dead. There is hope though, to all the veterans out there who drink to be numb, think of friends lost, live in guilt, are hurting daily, or just waiting to punch their ticket. I just want to say I feel you, and you are not alone. Yoga, clinical professionals, and treatment are all answers. So I quote one of the men who saved my life. One of my heroes, mentor, and friend Sgt. Major Mackey, when he told me, “Stand down Marine, the battle is over, you’re not alone. Your brothers are here to help you, and the ones who didn’t make it home deserve better for their memory than you to throw away their sacrifice by messing your life up.”

Funny thing is in surrender, I have found victory, because I’m Andrew, I’m human, I’m hurting, need help. Great thing is, I found it. I found help through organizations like Semper Fidelis Health and Wellness, Mindful Yoga Therapy for Veterans, Treatment, and Veterans Services. It’s ok to ask for help, it’s not ok to try and survive on your own. The war is not over; we are losing the battle here with suicide, addiction, alcoholism, dereliction, homelessness, and spiritual suicide. Many veterans every day are thinking about or have succeeded in ending their own life. I’m sad to say in the course of writing this I can almost guarantee suicide has crossed a service members mind.

Yoga, along with proper treatment, and support is a great set of tools to help you along your road to recovery. So, please hear me when I say, stand down, the battle is over you’re home, we are here to help. Please, if you need it cry out for it, and stop being alone. God Bless and I hope this can help someone, because today I want to be a testimony of recovery, not a statistic.

Semper Fidelis,

Andrew

USMC RET.